Lana Del Rey; Or, A Standard of Inequality

Hey, you guys.  Have you guys heard?  Lana Del Rey released a new song.  She's up to like four or five now.  That's almost enough for a full album!  Here's some Lana pics cause y'know...

Did I mention she's hot?  And she can sing!  And she dresses like a 1950s pin-up model lost in a Russ Meyer flick.  We should all love her, you guys!

Except I can't, and here's why.